oI had a dream last night where I suddenly was working in an office that I worked in years ago, and a friend (who actually left the company before I did) was for some reason working there again. I kept trying to talk to him, to tell him I was there, but I never was able to actually walk into his office and say hi. The first time I tried, I was overcome with intense tiredness and had to curl up for a nap. The second time, I suddenly needed to find a bathroom. The third time, I was pushed aside by a guy who had urgent business with my friend.
As all this happened, I simply couldn’t make myself do any work for the company. So I did the right thing… I quit the job and said goodbye to my coworkers, as I tried and failed to take a kitten with me. LOL!
And when I walked out of there, even though I was kitten-less, the feeling was indescribably amazing – the sun on my skin felt like more than sun, the breeze felt like more than mere wind; I felt intensely free as I stood alone and strong in a strange city full of possibilities.
What the dream means to me: that I am still following usual patterns, though I am far enough removed from them to recognize the patterns now. Still, I’m operating too much from the old rules. I need to quit them. They’re not working for me, and I’m expending my life’s energy on them, and in the process, wearing myself down.
It sounds so simple – to quit – but it is anything but easy. How does one quit an old perspective? Yes, let it go. But what does that mean? Try not to think about it? Or the opposite – thinking it completely through until it is understood, and then discarding it? Over the years, I’ve attempted both.
Using inspiration, I think what I need to do now is not think about it… but I need to do more too.
Instead of letting that life leave, I need to leave it, just like I did in the dream. And I do that by focusing on now and on the potential that exists right now for the future – and what a lot of potential there is! The power of it almost blows me away.
Lots to think about!